Doing Zen: Moment Building
How should I live my life? Well it begins with that question. The question implies that one can take actions and not just be blown in the wind. There are two schools the don't worry be happy school (DWBHS) and the other KSRSS or know suffering reduce suffering school. I for the most part follow the KSRSS. But, sometimes DWBHS is in play as well, and of course some will say these are dualistic and are one and the same. And, others will point out that neither actually exist and are devoid of innateness. Hence skillful means is a tool that once used returns to emptiness.
We are doing life every second of everyday. Whatever we do is whatever is our life. In other words what we are not doing, is not our life but a carnival mirror that begs us to look into its distorted perceptions. So if we shift from the now doing, to memories and or fantasies, we stop living. What? We stop living? Yes we stop living. We are alive in awareness of what is happening and not just on the surface but deeper levels. A friend asks to talk with you. Her/His daughter is having a difficult time and the friend just needs someone to listen. How do you listen? First, with your timely arrival to talk, second by greeting them warmly, third by seeing them kindly, fourth by giving them you, your attention/awareness, fifth by touching them gently, sixth by breathing, seventh by not letting go of them, eighth through speaking softly but not too much, ninth, by thanking them for allowing you to be a part of their life, and tenth accepting that the momentary reduction of suffering for others benefits you enabling your compassion to grow it radiates the very happiness you seek.
Happiness does not come from not worrying, it comes from becoming fully aware that we share suffering in order to help each other; which produces what we sometimes call love.